Waterstone’s Spy Games

I’ve moaned before about the obnoxious ‘RT and/or follow us to win a free iPad’ marketing strategy on Twitter before, and I had another little moan today. It’s depressing that so many of the people I choose to follow see no problem with sending unsolicited spam my way for the outside possibility of winning something or other. It’s human nature I guess.

A little later, @WstonesOxfordSt demonstrated a different kind of Twitter marketing. If only more corporate Twitter accounts would follow their example.

It began when a man in a black suit and sunglasses came in this morning. 'Have you got the newest translation of Don Quixote?' he said.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

'Of course,' I replied. 'It's in the classics section.' Ah,' he said, 'Agent Jones. I hate these new code phrases. Come with me please.'
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

Not wanting to let him down, and realising the possibility of day off work, I followed him into the waiting car outside.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

They briefed me first as I had forgotten to put any underwear on this morning. 'No puns,' said the agent. I nodded in quiet agreement.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

'Your target is the Diamond of Quor'toth. It's currently held in the old Borders Head Office. We're
not sure why, it's just a plot point.'
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

The car reached Charing Cross and I headed into the old Borders store. Dusty and delapidated, the cries of forgotten offers filled the air.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

The floor was lined with useless gift cards. Once they had been worth thousands, now they were my path to the diamond.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

I found a door that said 'DIAMONDS.' I stopped to wonder how a door could speak before another shout of 'NO PUNS' came down my earpiece.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

But inside there were no diamonds. Instead, on a raised pedestal in the centre of the room, lay the newest translation of Don Quixote.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

The lights came on. Waterstones logos adorned the walls. 'All he wanted was the book,' said a hidden voice. 'You have failed, bookseller.'
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

The agents, now in familiar Waterstones uniform, came in and took me back to the store. I tried to sell them the book but it was too late.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

I swear these performance reviews are getting too complicated.
— WaterstonesTCR (@WaterstonesTCR) April 25, 2012

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